I talked to one of my friend’s parents last Sunday about my feelings of not fitting in. My friend’s dad explained to me that God sometimes has to “mud our waters” to get us to go where He wants. In other words, we sometimes get too comfortable living our lives, so God has to make us uncomfortable so we’ll move on.
With wanting to be in the worship band and feeling left out, God is showing me that He doesn’t want me here. I want to be here, but He has a bigger plan for me somewhere else, so He is allowing me to be uncomfortable to make me move.
My guess is this is why I haven’t been feeling like my home is home. God wants me to go somewhere else. I’m okay with this, but the thought of it does scare me. I’m afraid I will leave my hometown and never come back. I guess I don’t mind leaving home, it’s the people I don’t want to leave.
The thing is, God wants us to live lives completely surrendered to Him. He wants us to be like the disciples He called. They literally dropped everything and followed Him (Matthew 4:18-22). This is what it means to be completely surrendered to Christ.
I want to be this person. I’m afraid, but I know God will take care of me. He is faithful. He always has been.
Living a completely surrendered life scares me immensely because we are called to be uncomfortable. Living surrendered to Christ will center me in discomfort. However, if we spend our entire lives in comfort, something is seriously wrong.
I have an uneasy feeling deep down that my life will be very uncomfortable at times, and Jesus will be my only source of peace. But this is the life I’m supposed to live. I know God will do great things through me if I follow Him. I trust Him. I just need to get comfortable with the idea of discomfort.