I’ve been going to a Christian university for almost an entire semester now. When I first decided to come here, and while I’ve been here, I have heard people talk about how Christian colleges can be hard on your faith. I always listened as they explained that the routine makes you numb to Christ and pulls you away from God, but I’m just beginning to fully understand this and see it played out in my life.
Ever since I came here I noticed that something was different—or at least, not what I thought it would be . . .
I imagined that being at a school surrounded by Christians would build up my faith; however, the opposite is happening—I’m slipping. Why? I feel I have less purpose here. I do truly believe that I’m right where God wants me to be, but I need more. I was on fire for God before I came, but it burned out within a week of moving in. I thought it was the new experience of moving and that the fire would come back once I got used to things, but it didn’t.
Why is this happening?
Coming into a Christian University, I expected to be surrounded by people on fire for God. People who would be strong in Christ and seeking Him more. I thought they would be encouraging, willing to stand by me, and I expected us to walk together in Christ building each other up.
If the people here are on fire for God, they do a good job of hiding it. I was hoping that other students’ passion for Christ would show through their actions and speech but unfortunately it doesn’t. I guess I can’t really say anything because I don’t think it shows in me either, but I’ve always been the shy type. (Am I just making an excuse for myself?) The students here hardly take time to pray before meals.
I feel no drive to go and help others, to try to save the lost. This is a problem. I don’t know how people can go here for four years. I love the college itself, but faith-wise I don’t know how I’d make it through.
I used to be the type of person that stopped and prayed with people who needed prayer, if I didn’t I would at least think about it. I don’t do that anymore. No one seems to. I guess I overheard it happen once. Yes, just once.
I want to change lives! Whether I am going out and doing something huge for God or staying in my dorm hall and just impacting people by the way I live. It’s tough because people know how to be Christians here. Even if they truly don’t feel it, they can act it. I feel like I’m acting it.
When I met my best friend she had an enormous impact on my spiritual life; I don’t even think we talked about God much. Her passion and desire for Him and her knowledge about Him made me want to know more. Whenever I go home, I see this and my flame gets reignited—but I don’t go home very often.
If I can’t be the type of person that brings people to Christ because I’m not around unsaved people, I at least want to be truly acting like Christ to the point where I can help others walk closer to Him. Just because their faith is half-hearted, doesn’t mean mine has to be.
You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven. –Matthew 5:15-16